I am looking at this order form for Valentine’s Day Treat Bags that I can buy for my daughter to be delivered to her classroom on Friday, Feb 13th and the more I think about it, the more angry I am.
Fundraising and Donations in our Schools
Are Out of Control!
I know you’re thinking…
1. It’s only an order form…which means I can choose to not order
And…
2. It’s a Valentine’s Day Treat for your child…what’s wrong with that?
Well…
1. Do I really have a choice? Sure…I do! I can choose not to order and teach my daughter about disappointment or that you don’t need everything, but really?!?! What if Emma is the only one that doesn’t have a Treat Bag delivered? How terrible would I feel knowing that?!? Does that mean I will order her one? Or am I considering teaching her some sort of lesson? I don’t know yet. But the fact that I am even struggling with this decision seems so crazy to me.
Because additionally…
2. While it’s a Valentine’s Day Treat, which one would think would be sweet, it is also a bag filled with things that I don’t get to choose, Emma may not even like (as she is pretty picky), obviously costs more than I would spend to buy myself (otherwise the school couldn’t make any money) and means more candy and crap that she doesn’t need. I’m already going to give her my own selection of STUFF on Valentine’s Day (come on…it’s Valentine’s Day…most of us buy our kids and significant others something).
However, the bigger problem isn’t the Valentine’s Day Treat Bags. It’s the amount of fundraising and donations that we are being asked to do or give. Maybe it’s not the amount, but the manner in which they are being handled. I don’t know.
Let me give some more examples.
Our school (yes I say our because I pay school taxes), has a school store that has some of the basics that students need such as erasers, pencils, pens, etc. But they also have a bunch of junk. Emma knows that she is not allowed to buy anything there. However, as good as she is and as much as she behaves, everyone else spends money there, so of course she wants to do the same. The other day, she took some money out of her piggy bank, without my knowledge, and came home with this rubber hand that sticks everywhere (please note…it made a spot on my wall that won’t come off now…THANKS) for some amount of money. Who cares how much it cost. It’s the fact that our schools even allow our kids to spend money on things that they don’t need just so they can make some cash. I would be ok if it were the basic items as mentioned above, but junk??!?!?
Sure I punished Emma. No TV that night for her (because she loves TV and that is the most effective punishment). But it still doesn’t diminish the fact that I should not have to deal with this.
Because…
Not only do they have the store and these Valentine Treat Bags, but we have also had a Boosterthon, PTO donations, yearbooks (in kindergarten?!?!) a magazine sale and the list goes on.
Which by the way…the magazine sale…
Emma came home with this booklet in which we were supposed to fill out with names and addresses. There were 10 or 12 pages. Each page was for an individual mail-out. In essence, the school was asking to mail magazine requests to 10 to 12 people per student. I filled out the booklet with around 6 names and sent back by the due date. It was sent back home with her. Why? Because it wasn’t full. I didn’t fill out all 10 or 12 pages. I sent back yet again. I only wanted the requests to be sent to those 6 people. Guess what?!?!? Yep! She came back home with it! For the 3rd time! I finally had to send a note telling the teacher that the booklet was complete and that I would not be filling out all of the pages.
I could give you several more examples, just from this school year alone (and we still have 3 months of school to go, so I am sure we will see more of it), but I will stop. You don’t need to hear about each and every one of them. Who cares. That’s not the point.
The point is…
There has to be something different that we can do to help our schools.
I am one of those people, who, if I complain, I want to be able to provide a solution. However, I’m too frustrated, in this moment, to even think.
I do know that, we, as parents, have to finally figure out a way to say STOP!!!!
Let’s get creative! Let’s figure out another way to help our schools be successful. I want nothing more than to give my child, her teachers and our school all the tools they need to be SUPERSTARS.
But playing on our emotions, on our kids emotions, expecting us to target the same people, over and over, for money, just is CRAZY and UNACCEPTABLE to me!
I know it’s not the teacher’s fault. It may not even be the School Staff’s fault. Who’s fault it is no longer matters! Something has to change!!!
What do you think?!? Am I alone? Am I crazy?
I want to hear your thoughts.
I, in the meantime, now that I have vented, will try to think of some solutions, as well. I would love to be able to write a follow-up to this post with a theme…
Solutions to help our Schools to Eliminate the Over the Top Fundraising and Donations
…as a means to provide some solutions to this problem that will only continue to grow if we don’t do something to change it!
Loved this post and I completely agree. Where I live there is a lot of fundraising with all 3 of our schools. I am lucky enough to have kids at all 3 schools so I get slammed and slammed with fundraisers.
I am on the pto and we r always trying to find ways to raise money so for the school but we end up doing a bunch of little ones and go overboard. It’s crazy and I’m glad I’m not the only one to think that it’s too much. Because I don’t do most of them because there are so many going on At once.
I think the silent fundraisers that doesn’t cost people money is great like box tops & schoola but in order to get any money, they need to be used correctly by a lot of people. Anywyas, I would love to hear others on better fundraising ideas.
Hi Denise – I so agree with you … It is non-stop and happens all year long. I don’t like asking my family, friends, and neighbors to participate over and over and then will need to (as I should) help out all of their children.. I just don’t quite frankly have all that extra money to give back to our schools that I pay big taxes to.. It is so frustrating for sure! I don’t know of any solutions off hand – It would be nice to see their books and figure out what is going on. It was never like this when I was in the same school district many years ago. I have more recently just stopped participating. I know that is sad…. but – shoot… LEAVE ME ALONE is right. Let me know if you think of some solution. I still got 2 more kids that have not even started going to public schools. Ahhhh
When my kids were in grade school, we always had a purpose to fundraise, and we had 2 major fundraisers only, we never made any kid or parent participate in any or all of them, we had a walkathon and a gift wrapping sells. on the walkathon every kid walk but not everyone brought pledges never single out any one, we had a carnival where we could make it a huge fun raisers in stead just charge enough to cover costs to have a great family fun day, on yearbooks the same just enough to cover cost without making a huge amount of money. every school has family barely making a living and that is sad when they try nickel and dime everyone, in the long run they are hurting their school doing this, and about the valentine goodie bag that take away from the valentine class room party,
I completely agree! They even have snacks at lunch time that the kids can buy to make extra money. I had to write a note in telling them NOT to sell extra cookies and Rice Krispy treats to my 5 year old in Kindergarten. He is on reduced lunch program (so .40 for lunch) and they were allowing him to spend an extra .75 on a sweet treat, that honestly, he doesn’t need the sugar. I only found out when the monthly money for lunch disappeared in a week and a half!!! They called me to tell me his account was over drawn and I was like HOW???!!!. Besides that we have had candy cane sales for the class and students (from mom and dad), multiple pay a $1 to wear a hat day. Cookie dough sales, magazine sales, Fun Run donations, movie night at the school (Movie was free but food and drinks were not) 2 nights at the skating rink, and multiple different nights that you go to x restaurant and they give 10% of the proceeds back to the school, decorate a pumpkin night (pumpkins cost $10) . And we are only half way through the year! Not to mention the school store that my son has yet to discover. This is all on top of the items that need to be purchased for class or money sent in for classroom supplies and parties. It is terrible.
We all are paying taxes to the schools, whether or not we have children in school. Having said that, the school district decides where they will spend their money. They have their own agenda. Each individual school also has its own agenda, as to where it will spend its money. They may just want the kids to raise money for field tripsor books for the library. However, a lot of fundraisers are put on by special interest groups, like PTO, Band Boosters, or the Robotics Team. They too have their own agendas. Finding out what they will be using the money for EXACTLY is my first step to deciding if I am willing to buy or sell that fundraiser. My brother-in-law does not want his children out selling. Their family has decided to donate a certain amout of money to the group in lieu of fundraising. Also, as an encouragement to you with young children, my daughter is in 11th grade, and the fundraisers have gotten a lot less. When she was in orchestra, they did one. Now she is in cheerleading and they have done one. That is a whole lot better than the old days when we were bombarded. Now the biggest fundraiser we are looking at is college! Good Luck everyone!
It does need to end; or make sense. The first more than the latter.
I completely agree with you, Denise.
I’m so sick of the fundraising junk! Sending in $25 for Christmas Elf Shelf shopping is just one example. Less than Dollar Store quality items that my son tried to make as gifts with his heart and soul was a rip off for two persons. Multiply that by the entire school of students. That is a lot. They mean so well and we as parents understand our children and take their kindness to heart. Yet, the poor kids are raped of their innocence. That just sickens me.
I’m also tired of the endless donations on top of the astronomical taxes we pay. (Which does NOT cover basic classroom school supplies these days.) The list of needed supplies requested by individual teachers has me baffled. Where did all of the stainless steel school scissors and rulers go from years past that we already paid for? Now requests for tissues and wipes for the class for a few months? Are you kidding? Next will be toilet paper!!! School budgets used to include these and all consumables. To top it off, Government discounts are offered for school vending/purchases to make it more affordable to fit into budgets! Then the PTA has the audacity to send home STUPID community coupon books that cost $60 each to sell for discount coupons that our friends and family will never use… which is completely ridiculous! What is the fund raising for??? We already paid for payrolls, buses, heating/cooling, temporary use of textbooks, paper (some, as now every notice is sent via email in PDF now) in September. For the stuff that didn’t get picked up in our tax rolls? It’s not the old days of mimeographing and stay after school staff that is for sure. They ALL go home at 3 p.m. now. Clockwatchers. All of them. Collecting paychecks from August until July. Whoa… that IS 12 months of pay for part time work. I’ve never seen so many legal holiday/snow days/vacation/sick/personal/maternity/paternity days as I do with school staff. AND, you, the parents do the teaching at home! I get a homework check list and study sheet and projects to do with my child(ren) throughout the year. They give homework and the family is expected to do the teaching. The full teaching time needed isn’t really fitting into their contractal time. So it’s up to parents to pay for and teach their children an education in the public school system. I could go on for days with this, but will spare the details.
As for the silly holidays at school; another area that the school needs to get smart with. We don’t need our children to give and/or receive junk given by classmates as exchanges. We get lists to buy times 26-30 per classroom for things that really aren’t utilized. My son has brought home plastic straws with a snowman or a heart on it. I hate straws. He hates them. They are throw aways. I can’t scrub the insides of them to make clean to make them last. They are junk. Valentine’s? Really? That has GOT to be the most dreaded school holiday celebrated in history. I hate(d) it. All three of my sons hate(d) it. Yet, those stupid packages of crazy sayings printed you would never say anyway have to be passed on to other students who really don’t care? Unless you make homemade and special to make it fit, which ends up in the trash can of the receiver, is a total waste of time and money. Why can’t the children make a craft and bring it home and call it good?
My resolution for the nonsense is: I return fundraising packages with a note “We don’t participate in these activities”. For classroom gifts: I send in pencils and erasers. End of it the stress and torment. (for us)
If I could get bold enough, I’d add, “You got our $6k in taxes this year. You’re welcome! Happy Long Weekends!; Happy half days! Happy Thanksgiving and vacation! Merry Christmas and Vacation! Happy New Year! Happy Valentine’s Day; Happy St. Patrick’s Day; Happy Easter; Happy legal holidays! Happy summer vacation too! Don’t worry, we’re saving for next year!”
This is a subject many parents understand or don’t trying to, and it needs to be addressed. Teachers and school systems are nothing like they used to be but demand constant extra funding without value. I repeat: without value.